delayed reaction

Because I am not a nice person, and because people like to say stupid things around me, I usually never hesitate to draw a face or call someone out on their stupidity immediately upon discovering it.

Every once in a while, however, stupidity has an incubation period.  Like the time I met a blonde, blue-eyed could-be-gracing-Aryan-propaganda English girl in Greece and she said to me sincerely:

"Oh, you're Chinese?  I'm part Chinese too.  My grandfather lived in Hong Kong."

Perhaps because I was none-too-sober myself, I didn't realize the absurdity of her statement until the next day, at which time it was far too late to shoot her one of my trademark withering "wtf, white chick" stares.

So, two days ago I went to lunch at Founding Farmers with an old college friend in town for the day.

 I asked our waiter whether the "FF Blood Orange Soda" on the menu was premade.  As in, the type of pre-fab fruity soda of the type Boylan's or Dr. Brown's sells...

So garcon answered with a description of how the soda was made (pulp of blood orange mixed with a fruit syrup and seltzer water, in case anyone is interested), and concluded with:

"A blood orange is just a type of orange."

Maybe because all these drugs are making me a little slow, but, seriously, why did it take me two full days to realize just how riddled with stupidity that reassurance was?

Now I think on it, there's only one reasonable inference I can make about the motivation for his statement:

Did he really think I was worried that the Blood Orange Soda contained blood?

Is that really a plausible concern in this day and age?  A common question posed by restraunt patrons?

If so, I blame the irritating infiltration of vampire fascination into pop culture norms. 

I was over Twilight before it began, what with Stephenie "My books suck not so much because I'm Mormom but because I lack any semblance of gift for prose" Meyers at the helm of story-telling. 

Or its underwhelming movie franchise making undeserving stars out of: Kristen "No need to call an OB/GYN, my face always looks like I was just kicked in the twat by a cleated passerby" Stewart;  Robert "Blimey, my hair is dirty from having it up my own arse all day" Pattinson; and Taylor "I'm hot, but when I open my mouth please resist the urge to batter me with Thermoses full of milk" Lautner.

Even True Blood, with its hot hot undead, strains my nerves with its casting of Anna "I'm blonde and now openly bisexual but somehow still not remotely hot" Paquin as Sookie Stackhouse. 

Done with vampires.  Done with blood.  And somehow I never want to go back to Founding Farmers again.